Who in their right mind would want to smell like a goddamned green curry all day? Sure, they are tasty. Sure, the aroma is pleasant. But, for some reason, I do not think that women would be particularly turned on by the scent of someone who smells like he vigorously rubbed curry paste in his armpits first thing in the morning. Especially by 3 or 4 in the afternoon. Can I just once, please, bring a green curry to work and not have to listen to your idea about making it into a perfume? It is a bad idea. A really bad idea. It isn't even a funny idea. The only thing funny about the idea is the way I have made fun of it, and 1. picturing the image of someone actually rubbing curry paste into their armpits and 2. the fact that you actually think this is a good idea.
Seriously, just let me eat my goddamn lunch in silence. Just once. Silence. At lunch.
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